Well this is it. I'm now running in the evenings. Gone are the 5am get-ups, and the fresh bracing morning air that threatens to strangle me when I'm already struggling to move and breathe at the same time. Now they've been replaced by...public running humiliation.
Running in the mornings has it's drawbacks, but the big positive is that there are few people around to see you do it. Having spent the last few weeks steadily building from 1.8km to 5.3km three times a week, I have noticed the effect running has on my body. I'll be honest, it's not particularly pretty. As a boobilicious lady I know all too well how important a sports bra is if I want to avoid black eyes, but no'one warned me about my arse. My arse wobbles! And I'm not just talking about a gentle jiggle, I'm talking about my arse cheeks often falling out of rhythm with each other and moving independently with their wobbles, creating a ripple (tidal wave) effect which must be quite a spectacle if you're behind me! Now I haven't looked into it, but I don't think I've ever seen sports knickers for "batty-support" so at the moment I'm contemplating running in my Spanx. My only consolation is that hopefully by running, I'll start to tone up my wobbly bum!
I've also discovered that bizarrely, I don't seem to move my upper body when I run. I only spotted this by running in the light of the street lamps and catching a glance at my shadow. I don't appear to pump my arms like normal runners. I just hold them loosely in front of me, in a manner akin to a 70yr old power walker.
Finally I think I make a squishy face when I run. Like I'm wincing and in pain. I'm not...well obviously I feel like I'm dying but not in a "someone's just trodden on my toe" way...so why do I keep having the physically relax my face? I might not be doing it all the time I suppose (I don't exactly carry a mirror with me to check) and I only discovered it when I jogged past a guy with his kid and they both did a double take and seemed to physically recoil from my pained expression. Nevertheless though, it all stacks up and makes me aware of the fact that I am not a carefree or graceful runner to watch! For this reason it has always been preferable from a self concious point of view, to jog when no'one else is about.
All this said though, last week I manned up and opted for an evening run, and I'm pleased to say that now I have the focus of just trying to ensure I get all the way round without stopping (keeling over), I'm less inclined to care about what people might think when they see me. It's a real milestone for me, as I've always been concious of how people perceive me and the extra padding I've been carrying. Perhaps, when my efforts start to be rewarded, the woman at the bus stop that I tend to pass on my way round will notice less of a wobble from my arse as I fly past her...and if I'm lucky my face might start to naturally relax and I can stop accidentally scaring small children. I suppose only time will tell.
